


Heaven is a place on Earth

by Windfighter



Series: 100 SSSS-fics [7]
Category: Stand Still Stay Silent
Genre: Gen, Sorry Emil, Sorry Lalli
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-06-24 11:31:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15629811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Windfighter/pseuds/Windfighter
Summary: Emil had no idea what happened after death, but old age would soon let him find out.





	Heaven is a place on Earth

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this story looooong before we had seen Emil's sanctuary in the comic, so it looks like I headcanoned it back then - a large field with some mountains surrounding it.  
> 7th story written for the 100 SSSS-fics challenge, inspired by the prompt "heaven".

Emil didn't believe in heaven. It was a lie told by the old generations. Not even the old generations believed in it, but still found comfort in the lies.

Of course, he didn't dismiss the possibility of there being a type of heaven. People who had been close to death sometimes told about a bright light that was supposedly heaven, but it could be anything. Emil had no idea what it could be, but he still didn't really _believe_ in heaven.

No, believing was for the unintelligent, those who didn't require proof for stuff and instead swallowed everything you told them.

He had been like that when he was younger. Easy to fool with tales of glory, tales of peace, tales of honor. But that was a long time ago.

Emil leaned back in his chair, wrapped the blanket tighter around his legs. They didn't feel cold any longer, and he knew what that meant. He looked towards the sky, pondered on what would happen when it was time. Maybe he would see his parents again, maybe he would meet Lalli, maybe it would just get dark. Emil wasn't sure what he would prefer. If there was a heaven, would the Finns even get to the same place as the Swedes? Could they talk with each other there?

Emil had spent so much time trying to wrap his head around Finnish after they came back from the expedition. Time that felt wasted now. He had never learned more than a few phrases, and while Lalli had started talking to him a little, they never understood each other's words. And then, a few years back, Lalli passed away. Not willing to retire from his scouting job he had carried on, had continued until his senses was so weak they no longer warned him when a troll was approaching.

They had never found his body, just parts of it. Emil felt a few tears escape from his eyes and he lifted a shaky hand to dry them off. Instead of spending all those hours trying to learn Finnish he should have spent them with the Finn he wanted to hang out with.

The sun was setting. Emil knew it was time to go back inside, but he also knew his legs wouldn't carry him any longer. Instead he pulled the blanket higher, leaned his head back in the chair and looked at the sky. It was warm, red and pink and purple and he found himself smiling. If there was a heaven, that sky was the evidence for it.

He closed his eyes, took some shaky breaths and then he fell asleep.

When he opened his eyes he was bathing in sunlight, laying down in a large field. A head popped into view, a face he had only briefly seen in dreams the last years. It smiled towards him.

"I have waited for you."

"You're always here."

Emil smiled back, carefully sat up, looked at the man beside him. The smile looked malplaced on his face, mostly because Emil so rarely saw him smile. The man stretched out a hand to Emil, helped him to his feet.

"I knew you'd come one day."

"Is this heaven?"

The slightly younger man stopped, looked at the ground then shook his head. Emil tilted his.

"Why do I understand you?"

"In the spirit realm there is no such thing as language. We all share the same language here."

The man pointed to his heart.

"This language."

Emil didn't really understand.

"I thought only mages could enter the spirit realm..."

Emil looked around, looked at the deers and rabbits wandering around, before looking at the other man again. He still smiled.

"Everyone has a safe place in the spirit realm. This is yours. I've waited here for you, I've waited so many years..."

"Lalli..."

"Come, there's someone I want you to meet. We're not safe here for much longer anyway."

Lalli's hand grabbed Emil's, pulled him towards the mountains, and Emil followed him, followed as Lalli opened a door in the mountain wall and went through it.

"Your safe place will be gone soon, there's no use to linger."

"I missed you so much..."

Lalli didn't answer. He continued towards the deep water, stopped for a while and looked at Emil again, smiled. Then he took a step into the deep.

Emil made an attempt to grab him, so he wouldn't drown, but Lalli didn't sink through the water. He gestured for Emil to follow and Emil hesitated for a few seconds before taking a deep breath and stepping out.

Something broke inside of him. He fell to his knees, pulled his hands to his chest and took a shaky breath. Lalli kneeled beside them, neither of them sinking through the water.

"Yeah, it hurts. I'm sorry."

"What... what happened?"

"You're safe place..."

Lalli gestured to where they had come from and Emil looked back. Nothing, just empty space.

"What happened to it?"

"You don't need it any more."

Emil looked at Lalli, looked back towards his former safe place and looked at Lalli again. The pain had disappeared and he got back up, looked at the water beneath his feet.

"I'm dead, aren't I?"

Lalli nodded, slowly. Emil didn't say anything at first. Then he smiled.

"I knew it was going to happen tonight. I'm glad you were there for me. Where are we going?"

"We're crossing the waters, I want you to meet someone important to me. I... I told him I had something to do before I could see him again."

Emil tilted his head, the same way he had seen Lalli do countless of times, and Lalli smiled.

"You'll like him."

Lalli turned his back to Emil, started walking across the water and Emil carefully followed him, still not certain he could trust the water to hold him up. He hurried his steps when he noticed Lalli getting too far away, then slid his hand into Lalli's. Lalli didn't complain, didn't pull away. Instead he squeezed Emil's hand lightly. Emil felt safer now.

They didn't talk, and Emil lost track of for how long they had walked. Sometimes he could see others walking over the water, sometimes he saw things moving beneath them, but Lalli didn't explain anything. Emil didn't feel the need to know anyway. Lalli stopped when they reached the other side of the wast ocean, stopped before he put his feet on the ground, and turned towards Emil.

"I'm not sure what's going to happen now. He's going to help us, but I don't know if it hurts, or where we're going to end up when it's done. Emil, do you feel ready for this?"

"I was ready for everything to just become dark. What's the worst that could happen?"

He smiled as he said it, memories of the expedition where he met Lalli surfacing. It had been horrible, it had been wonderful, it had been an _experience_. He didn't regret going, although he wished he could have met Lalli under safer conditions. Lalli nodded, hugged Emil's hand.

"Wherever we're going, we're going together. There's no one I'd rather die with than you."

Emil hugged Lalli's hand back.

"Likewise. I'm ready when you are."

Lalli nodded again, put his feet on the solid ground and Emil followed him.

"All safe places looks different, I don't remember how the one we're going to is looking."

"How did yours look?"

"There was water, trees, a raft. I always woke up on the raft. I don't think you would have liked my haven though, too Finnish for you."

"Don't say that, I bet it was relaxing."

Lalli led the way, Emil could see trees further ahead. Lalli stopped right as they were about to enter the forest. Emil tried to continue, but walked right into an invisible wall. Lalli laughed quietly.

"We're too weak to come through here. We have to wait for him to let us in."

"Who is it?"

"You'll see, soon."

Lalli sat down in the shallow water, leaned against the invisible wall, and Emil sat down beside him, looked at the vast world before them. He didn't know how long they had waited when they heard someone calling. Lalli got up, Emil quickly followed and turned towards the forest again. A slender man about 30 years younger than Emil stood among the trees, looking at them. His hair was light gray like Lalli's, his nose just as sharp. Emil looked towards his friend, asking for an explanation, but Lalli only smiled towards the other man, who carefully got closer to the wall.

"I'll open up now, you'll have to hurry inside."

Even the young man's voice reminded Emil about Lalli. He looked between the two, Lalli pulled him through the hole in the wall and it closed behind them again.

"Lalli, is this your son?"

Lalli nodded. Emil looked at the young man, who looked back at him.

"Dad, is this the one you told me about?"

Lalli nodded again. Emil noticed how sad his eyes looked and laid a hand on his shoulder. The man crouched before them, looking towards his father.

"Are you ready now?"

Lalli nodded once more and the young man looked at Emil. Waited. Emil nodded, uncertain, and the young man put his hands to the ground, started chanting. Emil couldn't understand what the man said and looked at Lalli.

"I thought there was no languages in here."

"This is different."

They listened as the young man chanted in Finnish. Water lifted from the ground and danced around the young man, danced around Lalli and Emil. Covered them. Emil could feel them sinking, slowly getting colder. He stretched out a hand, Lalli grabbing it with his own. One last of Lalli's rare smiles fired of in Emil's direction. The young man's voice was shaky, sad, and his tears mixed with the water.

The ground swallowed them. Emil saw Lalli close his eyes, closed his own, and let the darkness take him away.

Emil didn't believe in heaven, never had. Heaven was just a story told by the old people, a story to give them comfort at the thought of death. But in death he found his own heaven.

 


End file.
